SINGER: Stephen Lynch

SONG:If I Were Gay

Here we are, dear old friend
you and i, drunk again
laughs have been had
tears have been shed
maybe the whisky's gone to my head
But if i were gay, i would give you my heart
and if i were gay, you'd be my work of art
and if i were gay, we would swim in romance
but i'm not gay, so get your hand out of my pants
It's not that i don't care, i do
i just dont see myself in you
another time, another scene
i'd be right behind you if you know what i mean
'cause if i were gay, i would give soul
and if i were gay, i would give you my whole... being
and if i were gay, we would tear down the walls
but i'm not gay, so won't you stop cupping my ba... hand

we've never hugged, we've never kissed
i've never been intimate with your fist
you have opened brand new doors
get over here and drop... your... drawers